Five Jokes: 12-14-2023
Five Jokes: 12-14-2023
Original Mickey Mouse Enters Public Domain, Impeachment Inquiry Into President Biden, A Dolphin With 'Thumbs,' Trevor Noah At The Grammys, and Mark Zuckerberg's Secret Hawaiian Compound
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Hey! It’s Thursday, and these are Five Jokes!
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Y’all hear about this?..
The earliest version of Mickey Mouse is set to become public domain in 2024 — and rival companies have already released teasers for how they’ll use him:
The House of Representatives voted to formalize an impeachment inquiry into President Biden. For those unfamiliar with the process, every member of the GOP must approach Biden and ask “Can I pweeease impeach you?” until he relents.
A dolphin with 'thumbs' was spotted by scientists in Gulf of Corinth. They’ve classified it as a dangerous new species called “Film Critic.”
Trevor Noah will return to host the 2024 Grammys for the fourth year in a row. Or is it the third time? Or the second? Or the fifth? Hey, if you’re able to distinguish any of the days, weeks, months and years since 2020 you should be winning an award.
Finally…
Mark Zuckerberg has a top—secret Hawaii compound equipped with an underground bunker. Some speculate he’s preparing for World War III. Others say he’s opening an exciting free theme park called Face Land: The Happiest Place On Earth For The Low Price Of Access To 100% Of Your Information.
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REST WELL, KENNY DEFOREST
I didn’t know him well, but there is a level of closeness that all comics who started out in Chicago feel regardless of industry status, social circles or class. We’ve all been in the same dingy rooms, wax poetic about “the Tamale guy,” and if you were there in a certain era — know what it means wait anxiously outside of Jokes and Notes to get picked for the open mic, or drunkenly sing about “Go-Gals” in Town Hall Pub. When I think of Kenny, I think of a funny guy in the “class” above me, eager to break ground across the divisions of the South and North sides. He did that and so much more, all while maintaining the energy of a sports coach — the type I could imagine saying “you can do it!” despite my being overweight and having zero interest in the game. When you leave the Windy City, meeting people from the Chicago scene elsewhere always feels like a little slice of heaven. The last time I saw Kenny was in June at a party in New York. He seemed contemplative — the way most comics seem these days, trying to suss out what our goals are in the post-pandemic world. But he was still incredibly kind. He made a point of saying hi to me and added something like “You look good!” Though brief, it felt like a level of conversation we’d never had before — and for some odd reason, that small exchange has lingered in my mind ever since. He was eager to connect, learn, and lead with positivity. And the reason you’ll see so many comedians posting about him in the coming weeks is because he was always there to remind us that connection on and off stage is what comedy is all about.
Here’s what was written about Kenny on the GoFundMe page for his medical expenses and memorial:
Kenny DeForest is and was a truly positive influence on all the lives he touched. Kenny died on Wednesday December 13th at Kings County Hospital surrounded by his parents, family, and friends. Kenny's final moments included some of his favorite songs, stories of his childhood, and memories of his extensive positivity and joy for life.
Kenny's impactful life will continue on through the gift of organ donation. Even in death he will continue to make meaningful improvements in the lives of others.
On Friday December 8th, our dear friend Kenny DeForest was struck by a motor vehicle while riding a bike. Kenny underwent neurological surgery to remove a piece of his skull and relieve pressure from a brain bleed at Kings County Hospital.
All the money here will go directly to help Kenny's family cover his extensive medical bill.
For more on Kenny's comedy check out his latest special right here.
STRAY THOUGHT
This is a new segment for a joke or “stray” thought of mine that doesn’t fit the standard setup/punchline format. Hopefully it’ll make me post on Twitter less. Enjoy (and feel free to share!):
SOMETHIN’ FROM THE VAULT!
Check out my 2015 interview with comedian and writer Will Miles:
“Why is this guy emailing five jokes a day?” — I explain it here:
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The Kenny news is so sad :/
It's only this incarnation of Mickey that's PD- Disney continues to control the IP related to him as a whole, so don't get any ideas....