Five Jokes: 2-16-2024

Prince Harry’s Sled Adventure, Satellite Crash Warning, Tennessee‘s Warm Beer Experiment, California’s Ethnic Studies Plans, and The U.S. Census Bureau's Sex Question

Pssst! — if you find daily emails annoying, you can modify your subscription experience here!

Hey! It’s Friday in America, and no one has the heart to tell R2D2 and C3P0 that this isn’t what they actually look like:

Anyway, here are Five Jokes!

Donate to the Palestine Children’s Relief Fund, The Carter Center, and/or Alliance for Middle East Peace.

Y’all hear about this?..

• Prince Harry raced head-first on a tiny skeleton sled going 61.5 miles per hour down a track at next year’s Invictus Games site, saying with a smile afterward that everyone should do it. And, somehow, this was the first thing to make his wife Meghan think, Oh, you’re WHITE white…

  

• A dead satellite will crash back to Earth this month. In lieu of flowers, please track everyone’s movements. It’s what the satellite would have wanted.

• Tennessee lawmakers hope to cut off DUI numbers by banning the sale of cold beer. However, certain brands are already prepared for the shift. Natural Ice, for instance, changed its slogan to “Hot Or Cold… If You’re Drinking This, You’re Already In A Bad Place.” While Heineken has made the controversial choice of changing its name to Car Soup.

• California will require ethnic studies classes in high school next year. Which is a fancy way of saying “The history of people who didn’t invent powdered wigs.” But some already object to how the discipline addresses the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. School districts will likely settle on the neutral option of whispering “Connect the dots…” before playing any episode of Star Trek.

Finally…

• The U.S. Census Bureau is thinking about how to ask about sex. Well… when one statistic loves another statistic they reveal their data to one another and multiply. But some do it just for the thrill.

Those were five jokes! Which was your favorite? Use this poll, or drop a comment!

If you enjoyed those, check out yesterday’s jokes! And consider becoming a (free or paid) subscriber:

OR buying me a coffee:

OR subscribe to my YOU ARE THE GENRE podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or right here in the matrix of my newsletter!

🎨: Madhuri Shukla

And you can always share screenshots or forward this to a friend!

(this post may be too long for your email — if so, read the web version!)

A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE

“The Meeting Of Great Black Inventors” from the sketch group Astronomy Club Featuring James III (my next guest on You Are The Genre — currently available to paid subscribers)!

STRAY THOUGHT

This is a new segment for a joke or “stray” thought of mine that doesn’t fit the standard setup/punchline format. Hopefully it’ll make me post on Twitter less. Enjoy (and feel free to share!):

UPCOMING SHOWS!

• “Uptown Showdown: Coffee Vs. Tea” — FEBRUARY 29, 8:00PM @ Symphony Space (NY) (TICKETS)

  

• “The Story Collider” — MARCH 7, 7:30PM @ Pier 57 (NY) (TICKETS)

  

SOMETHIN’ FROM THE VAULT!

“Why is this guy emailing five jokes a day?” — I explain it here:

Why I Email Five Jokes A Day

Letters from African America is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider sharing…

…or becoming a free or paid subscriber!

See you tomorrow with…

Like that cartoon face in the logo? It was illustrated by DeAngelo — the talented character/prop designer/YouTuber known as “Hats Off Media!” DeAngelo is working hard an an awesome new cartoon called ScreenTime (teaser). Consider supporting it here!