Five Jokes: 2-3-2025
Musk In The Treasury's Payment System, Beyoncé Makes GRAMMYs History, A Trio Of Car-Sized Asteroids, Canadian Reactions To Tariffs, and OpenAI's Involvement With American Nuclear Systems
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Hey! It’s Monday, and Donald Trump has imposed new tariffs on imports from Mexico, Canada, China — and yes, sadly, even here in the humble country of African America.
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Speaking of liquid, I’m really —
— and here are FIVE JOKES!
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Y’all hear about this?..
Elon Musk’s team now has access to the treasury’s payments system. Guess that means trickle down economics starts from space now. “Don’t worry! The money will get to ya… as soon as it cuts through the atmosphere.”
Beyoncé made history at the 2025 GRAMMYs, by becoming the first Black woman to take home the award for Best Country Album. However, during her speech, at least one other nominee in that category was seen drawing a red line around her perimeter.
NASA is tracking a trio of vehicle-sized asteroids set to whizz close to the Earth today — with one getting three times nearer than the orbit of the moon. But, don’t be alarmed, there’s a 99% chance it’s just filming for Fast & Furious 11.
Canadians have canceled trips south of the border, boycotted U.S. alcohol and other products and even booed at sporting events after the U.S. announced 25% tariffs on most of Canada's goods. One major example of how dire things are over there: For the first time in his career, Canadian superstar, Drake, feels the urge to sing-rap about something relevant.
Finally…
OpenAI, the company behind ChatGPT, has announced that the US National Laboratories will use its AI models to help with a "comprehensive program in nuclear security." The Trump administration has, of course, recently installed controversial cartoon child scientist, Dexter, as head of U.S. National Laboratories, so don’t be surprised if we enter a nuclear arms race with Mojo Jojo.
Those were five jokes! Which was your favorite? Use this poll, or drop a comment!
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A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE
Black History Month! a.k.a, your yearly reminder to watch Sherman’s Showcase…
STRAY THOUGHT
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
PBS on the disappearance of the often forgotten entertainment legend, Hazel Scott…
on How WWII shaped contemporary Japanese (and global) media...
And… waxes poetic in the state of comedic film and compiles a comprehensive list of them worth checking out (wow, heaving use of “c” in that sentence).
SOMETHIN’ MORE!
There’s still time to vote on your favorite jokes from last week!
And, the first installment of my The Alternate Timeline if Morgan Stern sci-fi short story series is now live at !
Morgan Stern & the Spyglass (PART 1)
EXCERPT:
Sunlit, panting and slipping on Chicago ice, Morgan Pollyann Stern runs late for being early.
—Tempus Tower cameras scan reluctant brown eyes—
A final member of the elite and shrinking group of human tech journalists, she has the additional honor of being an outcast among them.
—the hands of a platinum gate unclasp—
The ingredients of this bitter social cocktail include a pinch of her working-class parentage, a dash of her far too social demeanor, and a smidgeon or two of her religious insistence on being offline whenever possible.
—an elevating closet’s mouth opens—
She’s also un-chipped, shorter than most, thick in ways unadvertised in clothing holograms, and dark in both humor and skin.
—automated green light signals travel to the 34th platform—
But, most rebelliously, she’s attractive.
—2… 3… 4…—
Distractingly so…
—21… 22… 23…—
…in a manner her peers find puzzling from afar and threatening up close.
—34.
She checks her watch. Damn it. Right on time.
“Why are is this guy emailing five jokes a day?” — I explain it all here:
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Great jokes as always (I voted for your Beyoncé bit- that was sharp as hell).
Also, thank you very much for sharing my newsletter! I feel validated x100