Five Jokes: 4-10-2024

Ireland's Youngest Prime Minister, The U.S.'s Even Political Divide, Apples Search For Miami Office Space, Progress In Foreign Relations, and a $6 Million Comic

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• Ireland is now led by Simon Harris, its youngest ever prime minister — seen here hoping that staring at candy in the grocery aisle will make Mommy buy it:

  

• A Pew report says the U.S. is now almost evenly divided between Democrats and Republicans. But, given the fact that most Republicans still have wrist bands from the Civil War, this is a temporary stalemate.

• Apple is looking for office space in Miami, following Amazon and Microsoft. That’s right, tech companies are Spring-breaking in Miami for the dullest reboot of The Real World imaginable.

• President Joe Biden and Japanese Prime Minister Fumio Kishida will showcase a strong and growing partnership during today’s White House state visit. Naturally, the meeting will be commemorated with a surprisingly peaceful and cerebral spinoff of the Godzilla vs Kong series titled My Dinner With Kong.

  

Finally…

• A rare comic featuring Superman’s first appearance has sold for $6 million at auction. It’s new owner, a bald man who refused to share his name, laughed maniacally while exiting with the comic, shouting, “I have you now, Superman! Now, face my BIC lighter of doom!”

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🎨: Madhuri Shukla

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A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE

The great

Josh Gondelman

is hosing the 2024 Writers Guild Awards New York — and he’s got jokes!

STRAY THOUGHT

SOMETHIN’ FROM THE VAULT!

I had great time chatting with the fine ghost-obsessed hosts of the Spooked! podcast about my career and beliefs about the supernatural world before doing some improv (really badly on my end)!

“Why is this guy emailing five jokes a day?” — I explain it here:

Why I Email Five Jokes A Day

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