Five Jokes: 4-17-2024

Teens vs VR, Red Lobster's Potential Bankruptcy, Steve Buscemi's Mystery 'Wednesday' Role, A Tarot Predicted Lottery Win, and The Economy

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Hey! It’s Wednesday in America, and does anyone else think about this X-Men scene whenever you hear the Tyla lyric “Make me sweat… make me hotter… Make me lose my breath… make me water…”?

Anyway, here are Five Jokes!

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Y’all hear about this?..

• A new survey found that 56% of teens who own VR devices rarely use them. Suggesting they’d prefer actually experiencing Earth’s final years instead of spending them pretending to be an Avatar Na'vi while shopping for groceries.

  

• Red Lobster is considering filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy — while also begging men everywhere to “Please make your wives, boo thangs and side pieces feel like Beyoncé so they can treat you to a lavish dinner here.”

• Steve Buscemi has joined the cast of the Jenna Ortega-led ‘Wednesday’ series. His role is unconfirmed, but most sources suggest he’ll portray the scariest member of the Adams family: Samuel.

  

• A Michigan woman's $500,000 lottery win was predicted in a tarot reading. But she wasn’t aware of the psychic’s commission until her photo-shoot with the giant check was interrupted by a telepathic message, saying: “Twenty percent, or I’ll see a car accident in your future…”

Finally…

• Economists are raising their growth expectations — but stress “the motion of promotions” as the most important factor.

Those were five jokes! Which was your favorite? Use this poll, or drop a comment!

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🎨: Madhuri Shukla

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A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE

Not necessarily a joke, but if you watch this doc you’ll get a ton of laughs and perhaps a single tear. Get info on screenings here!

STRAY THOUGHT

FUN FACT! Mike Poole will be taking over Five Jokes next week!

SOMETHIN’ FROM THE VAULT!

Journey back to my You Are The Genre interview with James III!

[James III] Is The Genre

He’s launched a new Kickstarter campaign for more issues of his awesome Junior comic — which is layered with comedy in a way that instantly reminded me of MAD Magazine. There’s a natural, steady flow of jokes and character development that moves along with the story—but you can also linger on each panel and page to discover something entirely new and hilarious.

For more information about James and all things RULE OF III, INC. please visit ruleof3inc.com and follow us at @ruleof3inc and @ruleof3comics

“Why is this guy emailing five jokes a day?” — I explain it here:

Why I Email Five Jokes A Day

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