Five Jokes: 5-14-2024

Mark Zuckerberg Turns 40, Biden's Chip Factory Expansion, New ChatGPT Advancements, An Alleged Spider Smuggler, and Ice Spice MetroCards

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Hey! It’s Tuesday in America and, these are the three types of small talk you’ll find at every party…

…and here are Five Jokes!

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Y’all hear about this?..

• Mark Zuckerberg turns 40 today. But, thanks to his immense wealth, he won’t actually feel his mid-life crisis until he arrives at his prescheduled death bed.

• The Biden administration will expand a chip factory in Minnesota. And if you’re wondering why he’s been so focused on chip factories lately — no one’s told they aren’t Ahoy!

• OpenAI unveiled a new version of ChatGPT that can respond to voice commands, images and videos. Said one sassy robot, “An algorithm that listens, compliments your pics and laughs at the TikTok videos you send?! Girl, you better marry it!”

• A US museum curator was detained in Turkey on claims of spider smuggling. “Yes…” said the curator. “I’m smuggling spiders… not the ancient coins they’re crawling on.”

Finally…

• Four subway stations will sell a limited-edition MetroCard featuring the New York rapper Ice Spice, Time Out reports.

  Which explains one child’s grandpa can’t stop looking at it and shouting “yippee!”

  

Those were five jokes! Which was your favorite? Use this poll, or drop a comment!

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🎨: Madhuri Shukla

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A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE

Roy Wood Jr. on filter culture…

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