Five Jokes: 5-14-2025
New Airbnb Features, Trump Officials Outed Fir Nazi Sentiments, The Copyright Office Fights Back, VPN vs The People, and The New Pope’s Social Media
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Hey! It’s Wednesday in America, I’m chatting live with best-selling author Lev Grossman later today —
— and, wait, —
Anyway, here are FIVE JOKES!
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Airbnb says users will now be able to book luxury services like personal trainers, massages and chefs. Rolling out with these features is Airbnb’s new slogan: “Remember, As Long As Your Payin’ ‘‘Em, It Ain’t Slavery!”
NPR has identified three Trump officials with close ties to antisemitic extremists, including a man described by federal prosecutors as a "Nazi sympathizer," and a prominent Holocaust denier. Upon hearing the news, one member of the cabinet was overheard whispering “How did they know we hired Kanye as U.S. Rhyme Tzar?”
What initially appeared to be a power play by Elon Musk and the Department of Government Efficiency to take over the US Copyright Office by having Donald Trump remove the officials in charge has now backfired in spectacular fashion, as Trump’s acting replacements are known to be unfriendly — and even downright hostile — to the tech industry. Facebook is most concerned, as the the Copyright Office’s hostility totech could mean they’ll “poke” in person.
A VPN company canceled all lifetime subscriptions, claiming it didn’t know about them —marking the first such dispute to be resolved via live Maury Povitch paternity test.
Finally…
Pope Leo XIV has taken over the Vatican’s official social media handles, with a first Instagram post on Tuesday repeating the first words he said to the world as pope: “Peace be with you all!” But, in an unexpected move, the text was supplemented with a blurry meme of Spongebop. A man of the people, indeed…
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A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE
Thanks to Maura Quint, you can find revolution anywhere…
STRAY THOUGHT (FROM THE VAULT)
IN OTHER NEWS…
[Interesting Headlines Minus Jokes]
And… Kanye’s Nazi song has been chased off of most mainstream platforms, but it’s all over Instagram
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