Five Jokes: 6-18-2024
The U.S. vs Adobe, The Decline Of Private Colleges, Maryland Pardoning 175,000 Marijuana Convictions, Boeing's Leadership Search, and China's Interest In 'Deadpool'
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U.S. regulators have sued Adobe, the maker of Photoshop, claiming that the software company made it costly and difficult to unsubscribe. But the U.S. is one to talk. Nothing is more costly and difficult to subscribe or unsubscribe to than taxes.
Nationwide, private colleges have been closing at a rate of about two per month. Maybe universities can learn a thing or two from movie theaters and start implementing mid-test table service. You know the class is about to end when the checks come out.
Maryland is pardoning 175,000 marijuana convictions. It's part of a new wave of progressive legislation being puff-puff-passed.
Several high-profile candidates have turned down the chance to run Boeing. The company then pivoted to approaching fictional characters for the role. Public domain Mickey Mouse is reportedly in talks. “You’ll pay me in HOW MUCH cheese??!”
Finally…
China will screen Disney's latest Deadpool film after barring earlier titles — leading eager Hollywood execs to insert Deadpool into other films — like this update of Challengers featuring a maniac in a red suit saying, “And here I thought the rule of three was for comedies.”
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175,000 marijuana convictions reversed? The hippies are getting their revenge on the Man, man.