Five Jokes: 6-19-2025
Another SpaceX Explosion, Summer Heatwave, New L.A. Lakers Owner, Two Celebrities End Their Feud, and A Doomsday Plane
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Hey! It’s Thursday in America, officials from Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo have reached a draft agreement that could end decades of conflict, and don’t forget that next Thursday I’m co-hosting RAD COMEDY with Emily Wirth in Brooklyn —
Anyway, here are FIVE JOKES!
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Y’all hear about this?..
A headline from The Verge reads: SpaceX Starship explodes again, this time on the ground. Which almost sounds like a compliment? Like, we’re so used to SpaceX ships exploding that we’re treating their launches like a race over which can burst into flames the fastest. Truly, when will Musk learn that his “starship” business is actually in the “missile” business?
Meanwhile, Honda successfully launched and landed its own reusable rocket.
Officially making Honda better at vehicles on the ground, vehicles in space, and cute robots we’d feel comfortable bringing into our homes without totally feeling like slave owners.
Summer will make a dramatic entrance in the U.S. this week with a heat dome that will bring stifling temperatures and uncomfortable humidity to millions. So, be careful out there. This has all the markings of a summer so hot that every town in America will be an improvised production of Do The Right Thing.
The Buss family’s decision to sell a controlling stake in the Los Angeles Lakers at an eye-popping franchise valuation of $10 billion marks the end of nearly a half-century when one of the most valuable properties in the sports world was run by an eccentric father and his sometimes squabbling children — a tradition that could easily continue for the team, depending on how many more children LeBron managers to bring on board.
The U.S. Air Force’s "Doomsday Plane" arrived at Joint Base Andrews Tuesday night, fueling speculation of a potential U.S. role in the escalating Israel-Iran crisis — or that the president ordered an emergency shipment of McDonald’s from a time zone still serving breakfast.
Finally…
Arnold Schwarzenegger has revealed the unlikely reason he and Sylvester Stallone finally became friends after famously feuding for over a decade. Turns out, their millions of dollars not only grew up in the same neighborhood, but are ink-relatives.
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SpaceX shareholder: "I'm gonna KILL that boy..."