Five Jokes: 7-12-2024

HBO Originals Rebrand, Russian Spies In Australia, Potential New Classification For College Athletes, Nicolas Cage, and New York Food Delivery Fees

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Hey! It’s Friday in America, and here are Five Jokes!

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Y’all hear about this?..

• Warner Bros. is rebranding many of its big-budget IP projects like Dune: Prophecy and The Penguin as HBO Originals as it rethinks what kind of stuff belongs on Max. Regardless, most will continue referring to those shows as “Streaming on one of them blue buttons…”

  

• A Russian couple living in Australia have been arrested on accusations of spying for Russian President Vladimir Putin’s Kremlin regime. According to neighbors, they seemed Australian in every way except for constantly asking “How long would it take for a missile to hit Ukraine from here?”

• A United States federal appeals court says college athletes may qualify as employees — making them only known employer begging for its workers to get hurt on the job.

• For Nicolas Cage, making a serial killer horror movie was a healing experience. So, for the love of God, keep him away from rom-coms!

Finally…

• New Yorkers have seen a 58% rise in fees for food delivery — which got complicated after landlords realized their tenants are delivering food to them to afford a similar increase in rent.

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