Five Jokes: 8-16-2024
Five Jokes: 8-16-2024
Organized Casino Crime, Locally Born Hong Kong Pandas, Social Security Breach, Water On Mars, and Biden's Chat With Martin Sheen
Pssst! — if you find daily emails annoying, you can modify your subscription experience here!
Hey! It’s Friday in America, and here are five jokes!
Donate to the Palestine Children’s Relief Fund, The Carter Center, and/or Alliance for Middle East Peace.
Y’all hear about this?..
A Las Vegas casino has been accused of catering to organized crime — and local judges have reported a sharp increase of men in track suits staring them down from the gallery while moving an invisible knife across their necks.
Hong Kong welcomed the birth of its first locally born giant pandas with their mother becoming the world’s oldest first-time mother of its kind on record. Damn, those record keepers must have the easiest job on earth. I hear they don’t even use notebooks, just Post-Its with tally marks.
An enormous amount of Social Security numbers and other sensitive information for millions of people could be in the hands of a hacking group after a data breach and may have been released on an online marketplace. The Social Security Administration is now considering updating social security numbers to “social security codes” that include emoji and an embarrassing personal fact, like: 89🥹-👅1-Still-Pees-Bed.
Mars is likely hiding oceans worth of water deep in its crust — finally explaining why Musk’s SpaceX rockets are filled with lube.
Finally…
Joe Biden and West Wing star Martin Sheen exchanged salutes on the South Lawn of the White House today, as the fictional President Josiah Bartlet paid a visit to the campus. Biden was overheard telling Sheen, “At least you get residuals.”
Those were five jokes! Which was your favorite? Use this poll, or drop a comment!
If you enjoyed those, check out yesterday’s jokes and become a subscriber!
OR buy me a coffee:
OR subscribe to my YOU ARE THE GENRE podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or right here in the matrix of my newsletter!
And you can always share screenshots or forward this to a friend!
(this post may be too long for your email — if so, read the web version!)
A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE
for the win…
https://x.com/phil_lewis_/status/1824165805858189424
Phil is also a great journalist and news curator. Subscribe to his newsletter!
STRAY THOUGHT
SOMETHIN’ MORE!
Over at — we talked about the new Skeleton Crew trailer and spoke to MacKenzie Green of The World Needs Nerds podcast about the evolution of George Lucas’ marketing prowess and what it’s like to be a newcomer to Star Wars fandom!
“Why are is this guy emailing five jokes a day?” — I explain it all here:
Letters from African America is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider sharing…
…or becoming a free or paid subscriber!
See you next week with five days of…
Like that cartoon face in the logo? It was illustrated by DeAngelo — the talented character/prop designer/YouTuber known as “Hats Off Media!” DeAngelo is working hard an an awesome new cartoon called ScreenTime (teaser). Consider supporting it here!
The mob used to own Vegas before the corporations drove them out. They must want it back.