Five Jokes: 8-29-2024

SpaceX Crash, Matching Dinosaur Prints, Reddit Outages, Blocked Biden Loan Debt Plant, and Ancient Rock Reorganization

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Anyway, here are five jokes!

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Y’all hear about this?..

• The first stage of a SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket crashed during an attempted landing on a droneship in the Atlantic Ocean. Amazing how times change. Years ago that would’ve been the opening line of a groundbreaking science fiction novel. But today, it’s just another random fact in the same reality where “Hawk Tuah girl” and “Trump-style ear bandages” are a thing.

• Matching dinosaur prints were found an ocean apart in Africa and South America. A stone tablet next to the second set stated, “please don’t tell my wife.”

  

• The Supreme Court blocked, for now, another Biden student debt plan. In a rare outburst, Clarence Thomas asked,“Can’t the students just become friends with Harlan Crow?”

• Reddit encountered widespread outages for nearly an hour yesterday — during which users turned to their loved ones, tried finding the words for “I love you,” and awkwardly blurted “White squiggly man crying with red eyes” instead.

Finally…

• A federal grand jury in Nevada has indicted two men for allegedly toppling ancient red rock formations. Seen here caught on video, one of the men seemingly asks, “Are you sure we should topple these ancient rock formations?!” While the other responds, “The game says there’s a Salazzle under there!”

  

Those were five jokes! Which was your favorite? Use this poll, or drop a comment!

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