Five Jokes: 1-16-2024
Trump's Iowa Win, A Storm Surge In Maine, Elon's Employment Potential, NASA's Drug Update, and Debate Over Whether 'The Bear' Is A Comedy
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Y’all hear about this?..
Donald Trump has won the Iowa caucuses — which, as we all know, is a crucial first step toward securing the caucasian vote. And he’s commemorating it with a white and gold hat that reads “TRUMP CAUCUS CAPTAIN” —
Which, as we all also know, is a first stage Pokémon that will eventually evolve into this:
A storm surge on the Maine coast knocked two 19th-century fishing shacks into the sea. A school of fish passing by was reportedly heard shouting “The revolution will not be televised.”
Biden challenger Dean Phillips floated the idea of an Elon Musk cabinet position. This comes after Elon’s assurance that he’d be able to run the nation on autopilot. “Sure there will be a few casualties, but check out this cool touchscreen I’ll install in the Oval Office.”
Speaking of Elon, NASA says it has no evidence of drug use at Musk’s SpaceX. NASA further stressed that it stands for the National Aeronautics and Space Administration, not the Narks And Snitches Assembly.
Finally…
After FX’s The Bear won the “best comedy” Emmy, many are debating whether it’s a comedy at all. Comedy bears Fozzy, Ted, and Cedric have all issued statements voicing their disapproval of the show’s entrance into the category.
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A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE
As pointed out by Ryan Williams on Twitter, Roy Wood Jr. wins funniest joke of the moment the award for mouthing “please hire a host” during Trevor Noah’s Emmys acceptance speech.
STRAY THOUGHT
This is a new segment for a joke or “stray” thought of mine that doesn’t fit the standard setup/punchline format. Hopefully it’ll make me post on Twitter less. Enjoy (and feel free to share!):
SOMETHIN’ FROM THE VAULT!
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🤣 I never noticed the resemblance in Cedric and Fozzy until you mentioned it, hysterical!
So you're saying "The Bear" isn't a sitcom? Darn.