Five Jokes: 1-23-2024
Five Jokes: 1-23-2024
Dwayne Johnson's Secures 'The Rock' Trademark, TikTok Layoffs, Fake Biden Robocall Scandal, Gen Z Gender Divides, and Pokémon With Guns
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Hey! It’s Tuesday in America, and you probably didn’t wake up thinking you’d watch a heartfelt comedic short film about Richard Simmons starring Pauly Shore…
And yet, you persisted. Here are Five Jokes!
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Y’all hear about this?..
Dwayne Johnson has been granted full ownership of ‘The Rock’ trademark. Bringing us one step closer to a remake of The Rock:
Starring THE Rock:
And set at 30 Rockefeller Plaza instead of Alcatraz. Which, according to anyone who works there… sounds about right.
TikTok is cutting jobs as tech layoffs continue to mount. Luckily, the cuts were all for the team tasked with making the weirdest possible video appear next whenever you scroll. Now you can stop asking things to yourself like “Why is this woman preparing nachos in a dirty bathtub?” and “Why can’t I stop watching?” and “Should I try preparing nachos in a dirty bathtub?”
Several New Hampshire voters received calls containing an imitation or manipulation of President Joe Biden’s voice warning them against casting their ballots at the primary. To fight future confusion, the Biden administration will only release messages via Harry Potter owl.
Over the past decade, poll after poll has found that young people are growing more and more divided by gender on a host of political issues. Highest on the list of dividing topics: What Restaurant Should We Go To?
Finally…
“Pokemon with guns” is the hottest game right now — and America’s only defense against the Digimon terrorist organization.
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A JOKE FROM SOMEONE ELSE
Tommy McNamara has a point.
https://twitter.com/TommyMcNam/status/1749486273104957843
STRAY THOUGHT
This is a new segment for a joke or “stray” thought of mine that doesn’t fit the standard setup/punchline format. Hopefully it’ll make me post on Twitter less. Enjoy (and feel free to share!):
SOMETHIN’ FROM THE VAULT!
Catch up (and vote) on the best jokes from last week!
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