Five Jokes: 7-16-2025
The Senate vs NPR, The National Guard In California, Medical Debt Is Back On The Menu, Soccer Concerns, and RuPaul’s Emmys Record
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— these next FIVE JOKES!
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The Senate voted to advance a package that would roll back $1.1 billion in funding to PBS, NPR and public media. The funds would instead be allocated to the new TruthSocial quiz show Wait, Wait, Rogan Has A Theory.
The Pentagon is ending the deployment of 2,000 National Guard troops in Los Angeles, accounting for nearly half of the soldiers sent to the city to deal with protests over the Trump administration's immigration crackdown. Saddened, the troops lined up for an emotional final order of Nutella coffee frappes (ice blended) with boba, topped with chocolate drizzle, almonds, and house creme.
A federal judge in Texas removed a Biden-era finalized rule that would have removed medical debt from credit reports. To better understand the magnitude, for most Americans it’s like losing video game race in the passenger’s seat of a car that’s about to crash.
With temperatures rising worldwide, scientists warn that staging the World Cup and other soccer tournaments in the Northern Hemisphere summer is getting increasingly dangerous for both players and spectators. However, soccer leagues have faith that a chosen one named Theodore Lasso, foretold by the legends of their AppleTV+ subscriptions will soon rise up from the grass on the back of a giant mole cricket to save them from the sun.
Finally…
RuPaul is the most nominated reality host in Emmys history with 10 nods for ‘Drag Race.’ Conservatives leaders would protest the achievement but, luckily, the ceremony doesn’t take place during brunch hours.
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