Top 5 Jokes Of The Week!

Legal Weed, Space Radio, Commander (The Dog), Colleges Tackle Race, & The Hottest Month

Hey, happy Saturday! I truly appreciate your support of these comedic updates, and hope they’re as funny as they are informative.

The weekend is a great time to reflect, and the subscribers (yes, you!) have voted on what made them giggle the most. So, let’s take a stroll through the recent past with the…

TOP FIVE JOKES OF THE WEEK!

MONDAY: 7-24-2023

• Legal weed is sending canine cops into retirement. One retired dog is quoted as saying, “First they ended stop-and-sniff, and now this?!” I reached out to the rest of PAW Patrol for comment but have yet to hear back.

  [read the other jokes from that day here]

TUESDAY: 7-25-2023

• A radio signal in space has been repeating every 21 minutes for 30 years and scientists don't know why. A chime every 21 minutes? That’s clearly the universe’s mother calling. Give us some space, Mom! Okay, sure we already are space, but — stop correcting us so much!

  • Then again, 30 years is a long time to avoid someone’s call. Just saying… If I were dating the universe, I’d be suspicious. Might want to check its vortext messages.

    [read the other jokes from that day here]

WEDNESDAY: 7-26-2023

• 'Commander the dog,' Joe Biden's White House pup, bit Secret Service agents 10 times. Bigger problem: If the service is so secret, why the hell do we know about this? Sounds like Commander is only biting the ones willing to squeal to the press. Trump had Roy Cohn, but Biden has “dog-who-wants-his-bone” know what I mean?! Hahaha. Okay, I took this too far. Noted.

  

  [read the other jokes from that day here]

THURSDAY: 7-27-2023

• Colleges are figuring out how to factor in race without asking about race. And it doesn’t help that admission committees are generally behind the times. Their leading replacement for “Are you African-American?” is “Can you Lindy Hop?”

  [read the other jokes from that day here]

FRIDAY: 7-28-2023

• July is on track to be the hottest month globally since record-keeping began in 1850. That’s right folks… it’s officially THE HOTTEST MONTH SINCE THE LAST DECADE OF SLAVERY! Good News: Red state school books will acknowledge global warming. Bad News: They’ll probably blame it on the Emancipation Proclamation.

  [read the other jokes from that day here]

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If you enjoyed those Five Jokes, check out the Top Five Jokes from last week! Or…

CHECK OUT SOMETHING ELSE!

Like the Power Rangers-themed reunion I had with my best friends from elementary school!

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See you next week with 25 more jokes!